7 Ways I Survive Meetings

There's nothing as intolerable as a long meeting. The key to survival, I've learned, is to take notes on everything.  

People watching probably think, what an attentive nurse, taking minutes!

But....

ACTUALLY...  

I might be.....

1.)  Taking notes on or sketching the postures of the important people around me...

• Torso slouched low in chair, legs on the table in front of him.  
• Head bent forward, wire-rimmed glasses sliding down bridge of nose.  
• Standing on the sidelines, lithe and lean against a pillar.  
• Never still, face in hands, then lounging back in his chair with his hands cradling one knee, changing position with every change of subject in the meeting. 

2.)  Matching drink and food choices to personalities.... 

• A yellow Rockstar energy drink aluminum can, now empty.  It crashes against the table as a prop in the hands of a gesturing doctor who's spouting frustration. 
• Water in a clear plastic glass, in the hands (of course) of that lean cardiologist by the pillar. 
• Cinnamon roll muffin, bitten apart by a surgeon.
• Banana, carefully peeled and eaten by a physician's assistant who exercises at the end of 15 hour days.
• Slice of red velvet cake, selected by a female doctor whom everyone likes.  This instantly makes eating cake okay.

3.) Making lists of great vocabulary words...  The beauty of doctors is they don't use big words to sound cool.  They just choose the best-fitting word, and it often sounds cool, sliding out seamlessly. 

• Disingenuous.  
• Incumbent.  
• Onerous. 
• Supratentorial. 

4.)  Noting clothes...  Apart from the rainbow of shorts, blue-green surgery scrubs, dress shirts, and white lab coats, there are the stethoscope people and the non-stethoscope people. The stethoscope people wear their stethoscope like an extra neck muscle.  

5.)  Watching people respond to or conceal electronics...

• Pagers going off (which is okay) and cell phones going off (which is not okay).
• Fingers sweeping across glass screens, or picking out quick texts held low against the tables.

6.) Listing interesting remarks....

• "Too much whining and we need more action."  
• "It's like walking into the Department of Motor Vehicles: you gotta have your crap there or they'll send you home." 

7.) My advice, the next time you are in a meeting....prevent early death  by boredom! 
Take notes!